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The Self-Care Dilemma

Here's the Situation

I'm a wife, a mother of twin girls, a mortgage banker, the co-founder of a day spa and (necessarily) a proclaimed self-care evangelist.

I started in the mortgage business in 1992 and have had the privilege of serving in an incredibly rewarding industry that gives me purpose and moments of great joy over the years. 

With that being said the mortgage business, like many others, is very stressful. It is a highly regulated industry where common sense does not always apply. In addition, we are in a 24-7 business cycle where the expectation is that you are available evenings and weekends. 🥱

To add to the degree of difficulty in 2004 I gave  birth to my twin girls. I was overjoyed to find out I was going to have twins, but there is no denying that being a mom of two at once comes with some unique challenges. 👶🏻👶🏻 Not only do you have double the diapers and bottles but you feel like a tiny traveling circus due to the amount of stuff you must take with you, not to mention the noise level and the likelihood of epic public meltdowns from one or both girls. 😩

Can I just say, as if the internal pressure wasn't enough, those are the days when all you see are perfectly poised and carefree moms with their calm and happy baby on social media. 🤦🏼‍♀️

At the time I was a top producer and branch manager for a national mortgage bank. I found myself sleep deprived, overwhelmed, unable to lose the baby weight, feeling guilty about being at work and scared that my business would be impacted if I wasn’t able to meet everyone’s expectations. 

Here's the Truth

For most of us, self-care is the first to go.  🤷🏻‍♀️

It is much easier for us to sacrifice our own care than our care for others.  Makes sense, right? We are moms. It’s what we do! Mommy guilt is a real thing.  It far surpasses the guilt we feel about any other part of our lives. 

Why is it that we hesitate to take care of ourselves as often as we should? Why don’t we put our health first by allowing time for daily exercise and meditation? How good are we to others if we are not good to ourselves?

Research suggests that the more we take care of ourselves, the more confident, creative and productive we are. 💅🏻 We

• make better decisions,

• build strong relationships and

• are better communicators. 

Self-care is important, especially for stress management and stress reduction. We all know that self care is important for your physical health but it is equally important for your mental health. 🖤  It builds our self-esteem and self-confidence.

Here are my top ten best self-care tips:

• Meditate daily for five to 10 minutes

• Read something that will bring you joy or move you forward in your life

• Do not pick up your phone for 30 minutes after you wake up

• Get a massage (my personal favorite)

• Take time away from work

• Go to bed early

• Say “no” more often, it’s okay!

• Take a hot bath

• Exercise daily

• Do something nice for someone else.  It will make YOU feel good.

You know the saying, “you can’t pour from an empty cup”.  You can’t take care of others without caring for yourself. ☕️

Here You Go

Permission to schedule your self-care time and guard that time with everything you have, granted.

Natalie Overturf

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